5 Things to Remember When Your New Roommate Isn't Your BFF

By Nicole Heyman on September 8, 2015

WARNING: NEW ROOMMATE, TREAD LIGHTLY

In the college realm, it seems evenly split between the people that think living with a friend is a fate worse than death, and the people that think it should be the only way to live. I have seen both arguments come to pass, lived with my share of randoms and friends. I’ve seen my friendships ruined after a signed lease, but I’ve also shared in the love that comes from the start of a new family. Moving out of the apartment I shared with Jordan, one of my best friends, was intense. Moving in with a new roommate was even weirder. There was sadness when I did not expect any, there was confusion when I shouldn’t have been confused, and there was hope that our moving away would not impact the relationship we had spent the last year nurturing. Moving in with someone else after living with your best friend can get tough, but keeping a few simple rules in mind may save the next year of your life.

 

  1. Their food is their food Your new roommate did not buy that gigantic bag of Doritos to share with you, I promise. If you find yourself in a situation where you think they won’t notice that one pack of gummies that you took, you are so wrong. Don’t open their milk, either. It’s tactless and totally not yours. Living with your best friend may have meant you had food even when you didn’t, but this new roommate probably isn’t okay with paying for your munchies.

  2. People generally don’t consider laundry to be a group effort Yeah, your new roommate put her clothes in the dryer three weeks ago and probably forgot about them, but that doesn’t mean you should let your clothes coinhabit. The last thing anyone needs is a bra that isn’t theirs hanging with the rest of them. Taking their clothes out of the dryer may make them upset, so instead of fluffing their clothes for a second time while you dry your soaked ones, have a conversation about laundry habits, just to clear the air.

  3. You have to work up to walking around naked

    Living with your best friend means that pants are basically scum and should never be required, expected, thought about, touched, the whole nine. Living with a new roommate may cramp the naked style, but give it some time! Winning personalities beat naked bodies, so do some friend flirting and win over your roommate BEFORE you forget the pants; everything is less awkward that way.

  4. Using a mirror in their room isn’t the best way to respect their space

    Your old roommate had a rockin’ full-body mirror and so does your new roommate. The only difference: it is not okay to go into your new roommate’s room to use it. Respecting space is key to a functional living arrangement, and if your new roommate comes home to you taking mirror selfies in her room, there may be an issue somewhere down the line.

  5. Now that your best friend isn’t your roommate, you need to pick up the phone

    Living with someone for a year (or more) can be exhausting, but an intact friendship is just enough of a sign that living together was a success. Picking up the phone to check in on your friend is crucial. Now that you both aren’t a hallway apart, there needs to be more than 30 seconds going into a hangout plan. Making sure your old roommate is happy in their new home is a great thing to do; they could be struggling with living without you, too.

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